Refuge

I feel strange in my body;
it doesn't feel young, it doesn't feel old.
I don't view it as a large figure or a small figure, but it's not regular either.
This could be a freeing out of body experience, but I keep getting physical cramps.
It's an in-body experience; the older i grow the more I am refuge to this strange land.
This body is proof that belonging is a myth
for it is the rawest form of home that I've known and the source of all diaspora,
and I can't help but wonder; if I hadn't been estranged in my own body, how would existence feel like?